Parenting is an important and biggest aspect of our lives as parents. It takes as much amount of time and energy as our work or home takes and sometimes more. It’s fun being a parent and it’s equally tiresome all other times. So how do make it more fun and less tiring keeping in mind we are providing the right values to our kids. We as parents are the first teachers to our kids for their social, moral, emotional, physical, and mental growth. We need our children to grow on all these parameters to be balanced and good human beings. Now let’s discuss some Parenting tips about each of these growth areas one by one.
How can we make our children socially smart? Our first instinct is to protect our kids from everything and sometimes while doing so we forget that overprotecting hampers their social growth. Involve them with the work you are doing. Make them self-reliant and self-sufficient. Give them age-appropriate work. Let them put away their own toys, school bag, shoes, lunch box, and rest other things. But for that, they need to know the exact place where to put those things. So teach them in advance. Give them clear steps to achieve the goals you have set for them. Let them help with setting tables; take them along to the grocery store to help them see how to buy things. Say your greetings with a smile and respect for them to learn the same. Let them know it is bad to make fun of anyone in any way and it can have consequences.
Now let’s talk about moral growth. India has a great culture of joint families. Grand Parents come and visit and the most entertaining time kids spend with them is through bedtime stories. What lies there in those stories which make them so entertaining and relatable? Moral qualities like one should always tell truth, should always be kind, study hard, help people and many more such lessons. We should keep that communication going in form of stories or tales to help them know the moral values and if they don’t follow what can be the consequences. Ask those questions to your children that what if you were in that place, how you would have reacted to let them relate to it.
It is most difficult to handle for many parents. Everyone asks me how to handle the emotional meltdown of my kid, especially in public. My answer is connection and communication are the keys. What you can achieve with love and respect can’t be achieved with just expecting plain obedience. Forewarning goes a long way when you are dealing with transitions. If you need to take your kid out then set the expectations prior to going out that we won’t be buying a toy today because we bought that last week but they can have their favorite ice cream today. If it’s sleeping time then you can let them know that it’s bedtime, they can take ten minutes to finish what they are doing and then should start putting away toys and colors and brush their teeth before they go to bed. So it has forewarning and steps for your child so that it can register in your child’s mind. And don’t fear meltdown, if it a no at the start it should be a no-till the end, let them understand that more tears and whining cannot make it a yes, it can a maybe if they behave nicely for the rest of the week.
Make time for communication, hear them out at any age, and let them feel comfortable sharing with you. The easiest way is to ask school stories when they are back from school. Try having meals together and discuss the happenings of the day. Share what you can with them so that they feel like sharing their stuff with you. Be a friend and parent both and build trust accordingly. Doing so will make them emotionally reliable with you.
Physical and Mental Growth:
There is a saying – “All play and no study, make Jack a lazy boy and all study and no play, make Jack a dull boy”. So try and keep that balance for your kids. I understand it’s a competitive world, the rat race is there everywhere and hence it is important for our kids to get good marks for the security of their future. But what should be that future? Let’s take the example of the movie 3 idiots. All the parents of the three boys decided to make them engineer without knowing that where their kid’s passion and talents are. What happened after that we all know in the movie. So yes, the future is important but if we connect the future choices of our kids with their passion and interests they are more ready to be happy and successful. Hence not only focus on studies but also encourage them to get good marks and at the same time enable them to pursue their hobbies as passionately as they want. You can set rules and time around them to make them workable
In the end, I would say studying is just one part of the whole bigger arena of learning. You can study for exams but you learn for life so do not compromise learning just for studying. Parenting is a vast subject to talk about and discuss so let’s talk again about few other aspects of it next time. Until then wishing you all a very happy parenting. Thank you.